I was looking forward to receiving lots of baby stuff, because we were beyond broke. And showers are for, y'know, showering gifts.
We registered for our crib, it had a changing table attached. We couldn't afford a set, so we didn't register for a dresser or separate changing table.
Our hope was my Grandma would buy our crib.
*I would like to take a moment and say that yes, as adults we shouldn't expect things from other people, and should buy our own things and all that crap. I know, now be quiet.*
When my brother and his wife had my niece my Grandpa and Grandma bought their crib. I assumed (and we all know what happens when we assume...) we would be gifted the same present as my brother, as my grandma knew our financial situation. We were living right next to her...in my parents basement.
Long story short, she "went in" with my aunt on our stroller.
Got some great gifts at my shower, not a lot of stuff we had registered for.
I was heartbroken.
Here I was, super duper pregnant. Not a "cute" pregnant. An "Oh my God what happened to you?!" pregnant. We had just moved back in with my parents, I was sick, tired, broke, nervous, hormonal, peeing when I sneezed, covered in acne, swelled up like a balloon, and just freaking miserable.
We had my Bro's kids bassinets, but they were still using the crib.
We ended up using all the gift cards we got and returned some stuff to get the crib. And, of course, my family helped us out, because they are awesome.
I was so stressed out about the stupid crib, I yelled at the lady at Babies R Us because they had to order it and it wouldn't be in for weeks. (Sorry poor Babies R Us lady!)
You have this image in your head. Nursery in pastel colors, tasteful crib with matching dresser and changing table, matching everything in a cute pattern, a glider to rock your baby...
We ended up with a crib stuffed in our room and a $40.00 pressed wood dresser from Kmart.
I was very angry with my Grandma at that time. She knew we were struggling, she knew how hard my pregnancy was, and it just seemed like nothing was going our way.
Yeah, I was pregnant and selfish, shoot me.
Looking at it with fresh eyes, yes I was being selfish and expecting things I shouldn't have been expecting from her. I never asked her for it, I just thought it was coming. That's how she usually did things.
She had no control in her life at that time. She couldn't control the fact that my Grandpa died. She couldn't control her health, her mind. She could control her money. It was the only handle she had. I understand that now.
She was a great Grandma, as I've mentioned plenty of times. I was not a great granddaughter at that time.
We live and learn, though. We did just fine with our cramped space and cheap furniture. I didn't need all the new nice things I thought I needed. And I learned to not expect things, and give my hopes up about stupid meaningless things. Treasure the moment, not the stuff.
It all worked out in the end. Sometimes being a grown up makes you feel all....grown up...
|He was mad because I put him in polka dot pants. |
In my defense, it was a Christmas outfit!
|I love dressing babies in funny outfits.|
|Pissed off at Best Buy|
|My ALL time favorite baby picture. |
I give you: Dork Baby